"I am in a hurry"

Wednesday, August 15, 2012

After almost being killed by a coworker speeding through the parking garage (who came right at me, on my side, coming around a corner at high speed - luckily I was able to slam my brakes and he to swerve), I was thinking...

How much bad behavior do we self-justify with that phrase - "I am in a hurry"?

What do we really gain from this mindset?

What price do we pay?

This is one of many indicators about how we are losing our connection to our humanity, to ourselves and to each other, in a quest for "more."  And the funny thing is that there is no satisfaction in this more - the faster, higher volume, greater noise level.

What are we afraid of?  What are we trying to tune out?  Or have our "fight or flight" instincts just redirected in an unhealthy way to a constant state of reaction as a result of our environment and ever-increasing volume of inputs (twitter, facebook, foursquare, linkedin, email, phone, text, radio, TV, movies, cable, radio, internet....)?

I have been musing a lot lately on the value of less.  Less hurry.  Less inputs.  Less physical things.  Less worry.  Less stress.  Less holding tightly.  Less illusion of control.

This Pema Chodron quote doesn't feel like a puzzle piece locking fit to my post, but it feels right and relevant.  (Addendum:  here it is; this is where my mind is trying to take me...  Substitute "hurry" for "blame" when you read the below.)

DRIVE ALL BLAMES INTO ONESELF

"There’s a slogan in the mahayana teachings that says, “Drive all blames into oneself.” The essence of this slogan is, “When it hurts so bad, it’s because I am hanging on so tight.” It’s not saying that we should beat ourselves up. It’s not advocating martyrdom. What it implies is that pain comes from holding so tightly to having it our own way and that one of the main exits we take when we find ourselves uncomfortable, when we find ourselves in an unwanted situation or an unwanted place, is to blame.

This slogan is a helpful and interesting suggestion that we could begin to shift that deep-seated, ancient, habitual tendency to hang on to having everything on our own terms. The way to start would be, first, when we feel the tendency to blame, to try to get in touch with what it feels like to be holding on to ourselves so tightly."

- Pema Chodron